100k words into Bitter Confessions
“Love isn’t indestructible. It’s so fragile, it can vanish in an instant. It can disappear as if it had never been.”
Bitter Confessions Update
I can’t believe it’s already been a month since my last update. Yikes! I swear, time is flying.
I just went over 100k+ words this week. The original manuscript/draft I started in 2021 was 76k words and I just went over 107k words, so I’ve roughly added about 31k. Not as much as I hoped in a month. I got bogged down in the opening chapters, which is the morning after the end of Bitter Secrets. It's this insane, epic throw down where they thrash out their history—the good, bad, and the ugly.
Since the draft was written before Bitter Secrets was finalized, a lot of the topics they’re discussing are moot and needed to be heavily rewritten or nixed altogether. That wouldn’t be too difficult, but Roth took the scene in an entirely different direction. I had a tidy list of things I thought would be appropriate to discuss at this point, but he tossed all that out the window and started pulling out the big guns—going straight for the jugular and discussing things I hadn’t planned to reveal until book 4. His aggressive attempt to clear up misconceptions from the past and get answers left Jasmine and I “deer in the headlights” stunned. His actions forced me to toss out almost everything I had and start from scratch. These chapters left me drained and feeling like I was going through a breakup for over 2 weeks. I literally just moved past the opening scene a couple of days ago. This continuous scene turned into a 24k word extravaganza that nearly did me in. Now, all I have to do is write the rest of the book. Joy.
As usual, the book is already so different from what I initially anticipated, and I just freaking started. I’m not upset about it because that’s just the way things go, but the constant recalibrating has me constantly reshuffling the deck of scenes in my mind.
I have never spent as much time with any characters as I have with Roth and Jasmine. Their story goes so deep and there are so many threads to it that I’m constantly having to check my notes to make sure I have my facts straight. I have to say, I just started, but I think this will be my favorite book of the series. It’s the turning point book and now that we’re in the back half of the series, all those secrets and buildup will pay off in spades!
I’m not going to lie. I’m a little intimidated by the size of this book. I’m estimating it will be around 180k words, which is like epic fantasy length. For context, Bitter Secrets was 136k words, and that's larger than the average romance book. But I’m trying not to think about all the things that need to go in this book, and just do as much as I can every day. As long as I’m working, as long as I’m making progress, I’m happy.
“Who am I, princess?”
“My husband.” Her voice was hoarse with strain. She wasn’t sure why that label was so significant, but it was and they both knew it. She wore his ring and bore his name once more, but she hadn’t claimed him. And he noticed. She called him anything but the label he’d once had. It helped her keep their marriage of convenience in perspective, but he was trampling through her boundary lines, muddying and confusing everything as usual. ”
I am back on Patreon!
If you love being tortured by teasers with no context and want to know every step I take toward finishing Bitter Confessions, I post every other day (sometimes more!) on Patreon. I post mini blogs explaining what I’m working on—developing scenes, road blocks, and do occasional polls. There will also be occasional writer rants. Lol. You also have access to our private Discord server, where the girls theorize and chat. I’m hoping we can do a meetup/Q&A in there soon…
I wasn’t sure I was going to have patrons this time around, but within a week of starting the book, I was desperate to share morsels of what I was writing and have people to freak out with and spam about my book. Lol. Writing is such a traditionally solitary thing to do. Generally, I prefer it, but with this series, there are so many surprises that more often than not, I’m shooting up from my seat and pacing as I try to wrap my mind around what’s happening. And why not share (torture) others with such information? Heh heh.
Having a community of readers who are as invested in the story (if not more than me) is one of the best things you could surround yourself with. The community’s support keeps me motivated, focused, and excited. Thank you to all of my wonderful patrons!
There’s just two tiers this time around. Because the raw draft of Bitter Secrets was leaked, I’m just showing snippets and behind the scenes stuff. Some readers actually prefer that, so they’ll be surprised when it’s published.
I initially wanted to implement a membership area on my website. I spent a week watching tutorials and setting it up, only to discover I have to manually input taxes for every country and region and keep it up to date. Yeah, no. So, I was forced to go back to Patreon.
I belatedly saw there was an alternative to Patreon called Ream that K Webster was promoting. I checked it out, and it looked awesome! But, I didn’t want to ask my patrons to move when they just joined Patreon. And I would have had to invest more time to learn a new platform when I really just wanted to write. But, it has a lot more functionality than Patreon and is specifically for showing chapters/uploading the book for patrons to read and is way more interactive. Delivering hundreds of ebooks to patrons on top of publishing was so stressful that I’m keeping it out of the equation this time around. But, it’s good to know this is possible with Ream if I change my mind.
Personal
I’m back in Hawaii.
I know, I know. I told you all how magical Washington is, and I still feel that way, but I had this window of opportunity to go home, and I had a feeling if I didn’t go, I wouldn’t get another chance. So, I took the chance. And I’m home. I just made two months and couldn’t be happier.
I’ve written the majority of my books here. It’s calm, quiet, and familiar, which allows me to zone out and not worry about a new environment. After being on the road, you appreciate such things. Also, most of my family lives here. This is also comforting when you’ve been on your own for so long. So, I’m happy and content and writing my little heart out.
The main reason I’m mentioning this is because of the Maui fires that happened on August 8th. I’m on the Big Island, which is the next island over. We had several fires break out on the same day. My brother had to evacuate, but thankfully his house was okay. That evening, we heard about the Maui fires. We have extended family who lost their homes. My cousin works for the fire department on Oahu and was traumatized by what he saw on Maui when they went to help. My heart goes out to everyone affected.
The personal accounts from the locals are absolutely horrific. Seeing the devastation and feeling so helpless when we’re neighbors has definitely impacted my concentration in the past few weeks. There are so many questions and even three weeks later, not enough answers. The emergency response to this crisis was handled poorly and so many suffered for it. Thank you to everyone who’s offered assistance and awareness of the ongoing situation there.
I visited my sister in Eugene, Oregon a couple of months ago, and we drove through Blue River, which was devastated by the Holiday Farm Fire in 2020. It’s been almost three years and some are just starting to get homes up, but the majority are still in trailers and RVs and some may never be able to rebuild. For Hawaii, this will be even more complicated and prolonged since all debris and material have to be imported and exported. It will also be 2x (or more?) expensive to rebuild than anywhere else in the United States. According to the news, 2,200 structures were destroyed and 86% of those were residential. Hawaii is expensive with limited land to build, so we’re used to multiple generations living under the same roof. So, when they say even one home burned down, that could be one structure housing up to 6+ people, which means the displacement of people is severe on an island that didn’t have much housing to begin with.
There are contradicting reports on whether FEMA, Red Cross, etc. are actually helping the residents. Apparently, pallets of donations were made, but not released by these organizations for one reason or another. There’s a lot of red tape and politics going on at a time when that shit should be put aside, so the victims get the aid they need. People from other islands are going around this by delivering supplies on jet skis, paddle boards, and boats to get the natives what they need as soon as possible. Personally, we’re sending money specifically to families we know who have lost their homes via Venmo and are not going through any organization. Just do your research. Sadly, tons of pseudo-organizations have popped up to make money from the tragedy. It’s heartbreaking because the victims suffer even more than they already have.
So many fires have broken out since then in Washington, Louisiana, more in Oregon. Also in British Columbia, Turkey, Greece, and so many other places… My heart goes out to all of you. Stay safe, stick with your people, and do what you can for each other.